The Christian Broadcasting Network

Browse Videos

Share Email

When It All Comes Together

Author Riva Tims shares with how to move forward in life after unexpected circumstances cause upheaval. Read Transcript


NARRATOR: Riva Tims and her late ex-husband Zachery

were the pastors of a megachurch in Orlando, Florida.

With more than 7,500 members, they

were driven to win souls to Jesus.

Riva was devastated when news of his infidelity surfaced.

She tried to keep their marriage together,

but three years later, they divorced.

Then in 2011, Zachery's sudden death from an overdose

broke Riva's heart and shocked the Christian community.

In her book, "When it All Comes Together,"

Riva shares how she overcame betrayal, heartbreak,

and grief, and identifies how we can learn

from any difficult situation.

Well, Riva's here with us live,

and it's great to have you with us.

Thank you for having me.

Things seemed to go really bad for you really quickly.

Were you surprised how quickly everything seemed to go?

I was totally shocked, honestly,

for it to happen that quickly, but also

just the intensity of it.

Sometimes you can go through a valley season.

But there's sometimes the blows are so hard that it

wants to take you out.

So it all came so fast and so intense.

As I understand it, you had like zero warning.

There was no sign of any of this.

No, no.

Just up until around the time when

I started to really realize it.

But honestly, for the time period of the affairs,

I didn't have any idea.

None?

None, none.

What do people say to you now when you say that to them?

Well some can understand, especially those that have

walked through that type of situation.

Because the way our ministries, when

you're traveling, when you're ministering, when you're

going from city to city or town to town,

it's not as easy to identify things like that in your home.

But you can tell in the spirit realm,

every wife or every husband knows when

something is wrong eventually.

And so when it came to the point where I finally

started realizing or hearing the Holy Spirit tell me, it did.

It took me out.

I couldn't believe it.

Well, were you angry at God?

I never got angry at God.

I had a really good foundation.

I've been saved a long time, but I did get angry.

And I got angry at everyone around me.

I got angry at things.

I got angry at the situation.

And the word of God says, you can be angry, but don't sin.

And sometimes anger can be a healthy emotion, but I was.

I was angry.

I was angry at the enemy for having the audacity to come

and attack us this way.

I was angry at just life in general,

but I can't say that I was angry with God.

Were you ever angry with the church?

I mean, you got some, what I would consider bad advice,

to just--

RIVA TIMS: Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Suck it up and let's move on.

You've got to put ministry first and not,

well, your family's fall apart.

You're right, I was.

I was angry with the whole restoration process

that we went through.

It wasn't done correctly.

And honestly before Zach passed, he said,

if I had better counsel, I would be with my wife today.

He would say that.

And sometimes when you're in the thick of it, you don't know.

But now I do know how to handle restoration

if someone is going through that type of thing.

So how do you?

Well honestly, you keep the family together.

And so when you're going through restoration,

you don't separate them, and this one's over here.

And you don't separate the kids.

You keep everyone together, and you pull back from ministry.

You pull someone else in ministry,

let them be there at least a year

while the family is healing, and while the family is

getting counsel together, getting understanding.

That's, to me, is the major key of restoration.

He eventually died of an overdose.

Did you see any of that coming?

No.

We realized when Zach passed, it had

been two years we were separated and two years we were divorced.

That was four years.

So I wasn't even in his world at that time.

So no, I didn't.

Do you Have any clue why he went down that road?

No, no.

You never ask why?

Of course.

Even for my children's sake, those are questions.

But I'm sure eventually everything will

be revealed one day, I'm sure.

Well let's talk about you, because here you are.

You went through what by any definition,

is just a horrible--

not just one revelation, but multiple revelations.

And you start to wonder, who am I married to?

Who is this?

Where is God in this?

And then you go through a restoration

process, which is obviously failed, obviously doesn't work.

You get into separation, then you get into divorce,

and you hit bottom.

And where did you come out?

How did you get out of that?

Let me tell you, God is so faithful,

because that's the first book.

Three years of just going through hardship.

And then the next four years is what this book is all about,

"When it All Comes Together."

Still going through a prolonged season of pain.

I deal with attorneys, dealing with the estate,

dealing with rebuilding, dealing with going

through grief, just sheer grief.

So all of that was hard.

But God has a way of putting things back together again.

And there are things that you have to walk through.

One of the things I always say is let go and let God.

There's a season where you just don't understand it.

You can't make sense of it.

Let go and let God.

You have to lighten the load.

You've got to start taking off your preconceived notions

of what you're supposed to, how are you

supposed to walk through it.

Because in new seasons, new dimensions,

God gives you new revelation.

So you've got to be open to hear what He has to say.

And even in that season when you're in that storm phase,

then you got to let Him take the sail.

There's times when you want to-- no.

But God, aren't supposed to go this way?

And God says, no, I'm leading you this way.

I've got another destination in mind.

He got another destination in mind.

And so all of these happen.

But at the end of the day, when you're

trying to make sense of all the puzzle pieces,

it'll never work.

Because you got a piece here upside down, some on the floor.

You have some scattered everywhere.

It won't work.

You have to let God start allowing

you to make the border first.

And that's what I often say.

When you have a big jigsaw puzzle,

you've got to start the border first.

And it's in that place where God starts giving you

strategy, where you start saying, as for me and my house,

we're going to serve the Lord.

As for me and my house, we're going to speak faith.

As for me and my house, we're going to say what God says.

And if you can't come in agreement with that,

then you can't come into this realm,

because God is putting this thing together.

So that was your framework.

Yes.

And you got to build that frame, and then say, OK, God,

you're going to fill it out.

Exactly, because he knows your ending from your beginning.

He says that.

I know the plans that I have for you.

He's given us hope and a future, and so that's

the picture on the box for the puzzle that we can look to.

He always gives us a glimpse of our future.

And so if in the late great Miles [INAUDIBLE]

said that if what you see is not what you saw, then what you see

is temporary.

And so we've got to keep looking into what God says

and who we are.

And God told me that I was his daughter.

I am a child of the most high God.

And what are I'm looking at it doesn't

look like a child of the most high God.

And so until I can get into that frame of that mindset

and walk in that way, then I'm going

to keep looking at the picture on the box.

And as God keeps putting the pieces together.

And now today, I can say I can see how He worked it all out.

What would you say to somebody watching this in the beginning

stages of this?

And from what I hear of all the statistics,

there are a lot of single-parent homes that it's mom.

What would you say to them?

I would encourage them, first of all,

to understand that the tapestry of life,

when you look at your picture, it looks knotted.

It looks messed up.

It looks horrible.

But God is working on a masterpiece for you.

It was just like the woman with the alabaster box.

She had great worship on the inside of her,

but people were looking at her exterior, and at her situation.

And they really weren't looking at who

God had called her to be.

I would encourage you to press through the barriers

to keep getting to Jesus.

Press through labels.

Press through any type of naysayers,

and keep getting to Jesus.

And as you get to Jesus, as you worship Him,

as you love on Him, the same anointing that you pour on Him

is getting all over you.

And before you know it, that same anointing that you

are looking for in Jesus, He has it permeating all over you

and in your spirit.

So be encouraged today that as every barrier comes up,

as every obstacle comes up from the enemy,

don't let him stop you.

You are more than enough.

God has created you to be more than a conqueror.

Be encouraged today.

I have a testimony just for you to know

you can lose everything.

But if you don't lose God, it's all coming back.

He's a restorer, and He will restore greater

than what you had before.

Amen, amen.

I love that image, the alabaster box.

Let the perfume of your brokenness

fill your whole house.

Amen, amen.

Because Jesus will anoint it.

He'll save it.

He'll redeem it.

He'll make it right.

RIVA TIMS: Yes, He will.

He'll give right frame and fill in all the peace.

Amen.

Amen.

[LAUGHTER]

Well we're out of time, but that was beautiful.

Riva, Thank you for being with us.

And if you want to know more, there's

a wonderful book, "When it All Comes Together,"

and you can get it wherever books are sold.

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

EMBED THIS VIDEO

Related Podcasts


CBN.com | Do You Know Jesus? | Privacy Notice | Prayer Requests | Support CBN | Contact Us | Feedback
© 2012 Christian Broadcasting Network